Looking back at my life I can see how the divine was always in plain sight and my love for truth my guiding light.
I was a very quiet, creative and spiritual child. Each night I would talk with God, my best friend, and in the quiet still moments of life the veil would sometimes lift revealing a sacredness that seemed to pervade life, connecting me to something greater and opening my heart to vast love.
As a child I would often ponder questions such as: “If the universe is infinite, then there must be a beginning and an end, and if there’s a beginning and an end, there must be something that precedes or comes after that…” and the question that seemed to carry particular significance as I grew older and navigated through the initiations of life: “What is this thing called life?”.
As I searched I sensed that the answer I was searching for was very simple, obvious, and close – so obvious, simple, and close that it could easily be overlooked.
Particularly in the simple and quiet moments of life or during times of intense suffering a deep surrendering and diving into life would reveal the underlying spacious ocean of presence.
As a young adult, I felt a deep calling to make a difference and I thought what better way to make a difference than to welcome souls into the world by becoming a midwife. After three years of training and internship in the fast paced, high-pressure environment of a major German hospital, my body manifested a chronic medical condition.
This signified a turning point and led me through an intensive 2-week period of sitting in stillness, self-inquiry, and contemplating life.
I made a vow that after graduating I would devote my life to truth. My intention: to surrender everything to the fire of truth, to be a living embodiment of truth, and a clear channel for the divine to flow freely and find its unique expression through me.
I left Germany with a backpack and a 1-way ticket. My journey eventually led me to Hawaii where I met my ex – husband who beautifully reflected all those parts in me that wanted to be healed. It took us 14 years, businesses, family life with children, owner building, and travelling to finally go our separate ways.
In the final months of the marriage I delved deeply into the teachings of Adyashanti and practiced what Adya calls “True Meditation”. The discovery of this way of meditating felt effortless, familiar, and like coming home – a soothing balm and sanctuary from the turbulence of the crumbling marriage.
During the separation I felt called to attend a silent meditation retreat with Adyashanti. During one of the meditations the veil lifted and I experienced myself as emptiness/nothingness/stillness streaming out into infinity.
This experience signified the death of the seeker and completely changed the way I perceived myself and life.
Several years following this profound shift in identity I found myself in what I call a “no man’s land” – a kind of void or in between space where I was not moved or motivated to do anything.
On the one hand I experienced myself as infinite spaciousness and on the other hand I would sometimes still feel myself being habitually pulled into old ways of relating with self, others, and life.
Despite this I sensed an infinite deepening and unfolding of presence and opening at the level of the heart. As I started to embrace all of life things started to gradually shift.
My greatest teacher continues to be life itself – revealing to me all that which wants to be healed in the light of awareness. I’ve realized that awakening is only the beginning – an opportunity and a portal into an infinite deepening and unfolding into the vastness of being.
If you are genuinely drawn to realizing your true nature, serving truth, and dancing with the mystery of life, I welcome you to schedule a private meeting.
To make sure I’m the right person to help you please tell me a little bit about your sacred path via email love@renatebest.com or the contact form.
I bow in deep gratitude to life that has brought us together and look forward to meeting you.
